New, lots of issues

[Andrea Munroe]

Hi folks,

My name is Andrea, I'm just getting started here and hoping to learn a lot.
And hoping to find a way to heal. Here is some health history on me. I don't know if all the dots connect, but some of them do, and I need to figure this out. I'm spiraling into depression and it is starting to scare me.

I'm just turned 30, mother of one three year old boy. I guess I'll start from the beginning, although I'm sure any chronology will be convoluted. I'm the last of 4 children in 4 years. The first was stillborn at 30 weeks. The second, a healthy baby. The third, born at 36 weeks with spina bifida myelomeningocele, a club foot, and cleft palate, she died three hours after birth. Then me, a healthy girl.

At 6 weeks, I suddenly developed a huge cafe ole birth mark, which looks as if someone poured coffee on me and it ran from right below my ear/jawbone, down my arm, down across my chest, and into my navel, where it stops. I don't know much about this except that the doctors were worried it was some rare and very serious condition, but then it turned out to be just a massive birthmark. It gets darker when I'm tanned and splotches of it turned black/purple during my pregnancy.

During infancy I had recurring ear infections and was constantly on antibiotics. I also had insane "growing pains" which led to more blood tests and xrays than I can count but they never found anything aside from very tight hamstrings (which didn't explain it, because though i did have growing pains in my legs/feet, I also had them in my wrists). My mouth is small and narrow, I've had 16 teeth pulled (4 of these were wisdom teeth) to make room, and had braces for 3.5 years. My enamel on my molars was malformed, they figure because of the antibiotics during infancy, and so i've had a ton of amalgam in my mouth for as long as I can remember (6-8 large fillings). Didn't get my period until I was 15, and no breasts to speak of till long after that point. When I was 18 I spend the summer tree planting.

At the start of the season we were required to sign a form saying that we understood the trees had been sprayed and that it would not be a good idea to conceive within 3 years. Being young, stupid, and having spent all my money on the plan to get there, I signed. Several years later I participated in a youth exchange to East Africa, and had a lot of vaccinations: MMR, Twinrix (Hep B & C), Yellow Fever, and I think 1 or 2 more. Also was on malaria prophylactics (Malarone) for those 7 months. Worked in a research lab for 4 years, in a sick building, using nasty chemicals. Several broken mercury thermometers.

Pre-conception, I was taking megadoses of folic acid (synthetic, of course, i knew no better) as advised by my obstetrician (6-7 mg (not mcg)). When I was 24, I conceived and then miscarried at 6-7 weeks. At 25, I conceived, thought everything was fine, but a dating ultrasound at 11 weeks showed baby died at about 6- but placenta etc had continued on. My file was somehow missed, so I didn't find out about this until 13 weeks, at which point I had an infection. I tried cytotec (prostagladin inserted vaginally) to complete the miscarriage, but this wasn't enough.

The infection progressed, I had a D&C, and because the infection wouldn't respond to oral antibiotics and my temp kept rebounding to 106, they admitted me and put me on 3 kinds of IV antibiotics for 7 days. On day 5 of this, I first noticed my tinea versicolor on my chest (fungal infection).

I suspect MTHFR because of my mother's history with childbearing, my own, plus my mom, sister, and I have all had periodontal surgery for gum recession (severe), etc. Hands and feet chronically cold. The next year, I was pregnant again. This time I had an uncomplicated pregnancy, picture-perfect, until 34 weeks, when I suddenly developed pre-eclampsia/pregnancy-induced hypertension, which progressed to HELLP (with swollen liver, low platelets, and a lot of crazy liver enzymes etc) and a partial placental abruption at 35 weeks, so my labour was induced- they needed to get him out because my blood pressure was very very high for me and my placenta threatening to let go altogether.

I had IV antibiotics again in labour as my strep B status was unknown. My little guy was born healthy despite being 5 weeks early. Jaundice requiring phototherapy but he nursed and gained well. We nursed until 2.5. About a year after he was born, I found out via biomerridian scan that I am gluten-intolerant, had low/stressed iron and vit D, and that my adrenals, thyroid, and liver were all stressed/low function. A hair mineral analysis test suggested the same, with very unbalanced Ca and Mg and Na and P levels (very high tissue Ca levels, suggesting that I am not absorbing it well, and very low Mg levels).

I can't remember the details but this test also indicated a struggling liver and adrenal/thyroid , and the practitioner made suggestions for Mg supplementation and a stark reduction in carbs, with a massive increase in protein... which I tried to follow but gave up on. I did eliminate gluten, though, and have been gluten free now for 1.5 years. I also significantly reduced dairy and soy unless fermented.

When my son was about 9 months old, I started to spiral downwards into some late-onset PPD or something similar. I've been up and down, but mostly down, since then (about 2 years now). Life has been stressful- I quit my job to pursue my birth work (I'm a birth doula) and to launch a natural parenting store, while also trying to be a full-time mom and active on 3 committees.

I was working 100 hour weeks for about 8 months. My husband and I have been arguing, I've been irritable and moody and all over the place. Recent challenges have brought me down to the lowest I've ever been, and lots of dark thoughts on replay in my mind, as well as some insomnia. I've burned myself out, I think, both emotionally and nutritionally. I've joined the gym and am now doing step aerobics classes (which I love) 3 times a week but honestly I've been even worse off since then.

I had 3 of my mercury fillings safely removed in April and I'm wondering if that might have something to do with it- this last month has been the worst yet. I'm at the point where I'm fantasizing about just getting in my car and driving away, and although I'd never do it, thoughts of suicide are running in my mind- I'm curious about them, but at this point not lending them any real attention- I have way too much to live for and a bright future to ever do any of it, but the fact that my head is there, often on repeat, is starting to really worry me.

Not sure if this connects any dots, but I had severe chilblains on my toes this winter, as well as numbness in the feet, and a lot of head-rushes when moving from a sitting to a standing position- not sure if this is a circulation or blood sugar thing. I've tried many things over the past 2 low years: bone broths, raw liver cut into pill size pieces and then frozen, vit b, apple cider vinegar, etc- but with very little consistency. I feel like my gut health is just shit, and my emotions/mind are just going down the drain. My husband and I are scheduled for counseling together next week, and I'm planning to make a separate appointment just for me as well, but I feel reluctant because I do not want to go on meds.

I know I need to learn more about thyroid issues (runs in the family, as well as depression and other mood disorders), because perhaps I should get tested but have read the the standard tests and treatments are basically useless. I feel like I have leaky/damaged guts, some thyroid issue, adrenal fatigue, and probably mercury toxicity.

I don't know where to start. I've heard of the GAPS diet but haven't really looked into this. I know I need more fermented foods and am about to order some pickl-it jars (though holy shit they are expensive to ship to Canada). My TCM practitioner has me on 2 herbs to help with my cycles- although very regular, my flow had really significantly changed from "normal" to being very "hesitant", brown, old, scant one month, to being heavy and very clotty the next month. I'm only a month into those so not sure how that is going. One of the herbs is also supposed to support chi/blood.

Sorry, that was a long ramble, just trying to throw anything out there that may help piece things together.

Any insight is very much appreciated, and I look forward to exploring this site and trying to learn more. Was thinking of getting a few books: the mood cure, listening to your hormones, the GAPS one, etc. I do have wild fermentation and nourishing traditions already, though not putting much of either into practice at the moment.

Thanks so much again if you got through all that, and if you have any suggestions or starting points.

[Andrea Munroe]

a couple of other things: i've had ringing in the ears for many years now (read about this with Hg poisoning), as well as quite severe light sensitivity (eye appointments are tortuous, and even on cloudy days it is hard to be outside.... this has been going on as long as i remember- all outdoor pictures of me as a child show me stading there squinting, shileding by face with my hand).

also, i did land myself in hospital on IV rehydration while living in kenya twice, after some sort of stomach bug/food poisoning so severe i lost my vision for a few minutes and was so dehydrated that my veins were collapsing (either that, or the doc just made that excuse as it took him over an hour to place the IV). not sure if i may have picked up a parasite there as well, or if that would still be an issue.

[Pat Robinson]

Hey Andrea. I am just seeing this now. I will read through and comment as soon as possible.

Pat

[Pat Robinson]

my internet keeps dropping: salt water flush, magnesium and selenium help!

[Pat Robinson]

will write more soon...

And VITAMIN C!

Pat Robinson said:

my internet keeps dropping: salt water flush, magnesium and selenium help!

[Andrea Munroe]

Thanks Pat!

I've been reading up a bit on Mg- do you think transdermal application would be better than oral (i can make Mg "oil" from the flakes). I am currently taking the floravit liquid mg supplement.

Salt water flush- how often? Right now I am putting a trace minerals supplement in my water (but it is just tap water).

Selenium- brazil nuts, right? Raw and soaked?

And vit C I can do, i think I still have some buffered C left over from my amalgum removal.

Any thoughts on zinc? the more i read on it the more i think maybe i need it, but am getting confused by the forms (picolinate?)